Turn your head and Cough?

I think that this was the hardest day so far. zero for 4 days...something like that. Jennifer and I are not fighting each other, but we do sometimes catch ourselves start to argue over things like standing up or taking off socks, or how we take care of something. My nerves are raw, flayed nerves exposed to the airor something else. We are in this toogether so...I am not erady for what is to come around here. Wish me luck. I think. How's your legs..."

Wow, I guess I am writing a novel in my sleep. Hope you enjoyed that one! I needed to quit anyway, because I cough a lot now. Bronchitis or something else. Compromised lungs? Quitting was the best thing I could have done. I will breathe more clean air now. I should drink more water though... Here Goes!

OMGOMGOMG

Words simply cannot describe the utter hell I feel for lack of a smoke. How stupid. I Jammed my thumb in the doorway to our bathroom after washing Sati the dog in the tub.

The Blinding pain I felt made me only desire a Camel, like crazy. Still at zero smoking for about 4 days now. Every little thing hurts my psyche. Non-smokers, go to hell! You have NO idea what it is like. Sorry, I will not erase that because it is not me talking and I wish to keep all of this recorded. I hate using spaces. I will stopnow.JenniferandIhavehadaroughtimewithsmoking,butIthinkthatwewillovercomethis.Also,shemayhavefoundanewjob!Thingscouldbelookingupforusnow...timewilltell!Thanksforreading.

another go at it

I am jealous that Jennifer is having less trouble with it than I am. That has motivated me. I just smoked my last cig and I tried to enjoy it as much as I could, but I didn't really enjoy it. anyway I am quitting this second. God help us.

Hoorah

Things must always get worse before they get better. 4 a day now. Yay! I am such a strong person {sarcasm}. I feel good though. I think that when I cut down to 1 a day I will have little trouble. Whenever that time comes, I will survive. Until then, I will smoke more than 1 a day. The only question is when is that day coming? When can I be man enough?

What if we all quit our jobs?

There are no more jobs except gutting chickens, running a f#cking "cash" register or cleaning shit that no one wants to clean. You get the idea. There are apparently too many people that have figured out how to succeed in life and make too much money doing nothing for society. The rest of us are left to clean up their crap. Why don't we quit working and spending money? I bet a human resources person would call an applicant back then!

This sucks

all I have to say. Depression. Work. Society. It all sucks. Thanks for reading.

OK. So I am still smoking...

Yep. I have not quit yet. Still on around 3 a day, oh wait, wasn't it 2? Anyway, I am in shock. This is REALLY hard! Just wanted to tell no one, so...you know. Post it in a blog. Thank you for reading.